Am I the only one who geeks out at the chance to go to Dollywood? For a place that has crowds, it’s one of the easier places for my sensory issues. Good smells, lots of color, lots of order, beautiful, immaculate landscaping and decor. The sounds of bands being played all across the park. And I’d say some of the friendliest people there too. Everyone, even visitors are so dang nice. It’s what I imagine Dolly Parton’s heart is like. I don’t know her in person, but from all the things I’ve seen, heard and read about her, she’s a gem of a lady! And you already know her rebellious ways and ‘don’t let society tell you who to be’ attitude is soulmate vibes.
My goal to come down here was to get my brain in a somewhat restful place so I can really get my writing onto this blog! I have mountains of notebooks, papers, folders of things I’ve researched and/or wrote that needs to be typed in. But you know how neurodivergent things go…. My executive is not wanting to function. Lol. And of course the ADHD pressure of “if it’s not perfect, I can’t put it out there, so I just won’t do it at all”…. I had to sit myself down and say, “Blu… you gotta just do it. Or you’ll keep waiting and waiting until you never do it.” And I was right. So a more candid blog is what you’re gonna get. It’s gonna be filled with slang and grammatical mistakes, but the goal is to simply get my thoughts out there. Bring a piece of myself into the world, maybe not for anyone else, maybe it’s just for me anyway.
When I was a little theybie, I always pictured my adult life as a writer. I had this one daydream where I would travel and stay at these cute bed and breakfast places in all my favorite states to do some writing. I’d be sipping a cup of coffee in the morning on the patio with my work spread out around me. I was always wearing some hip glasses (even though I don’t need glasses..lol). The owners and other patrons of the little towns would get to know me. It would be incredibly calm and serene and beautiful. Places that I could feel inspired to write at. So, am I here? Did I manifest this moment? A few of the details are different. I don’t have any fabulous glasses, the coffee got exchanged for a Coke Zero, but the rest is the same. I’ve stayed in the same resort for about 25 years, the staff and locals have always been lovely and I’m on my porch in the fall, writing, as the cool crisp air blows in my hair. I want to yell out… “I made it, ya’ll!” My version of success looks a lot different than most and I’m okay with that. It’s not about money, never has been, never will be. It’s the opportunity to express myself, to accomplish something, to push myself to do something I love.
The only thing that could top this moment is if I made friends with a Raven. There’s still time though.
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