Disclaimer: I am posting a very intimate one-sided exchange of Love. This is very personal to me. I’ve held on to these writings for almost 20 years. The writer is missing. I hope he comes home some day. I am aware that this letter and the other writings that I’ve posted in the SAL Collection have grammar and punctuation errors. I have copied his writings the way he wrote them. He was in no way uneducated. Everything he did and wrote was intentional, and purposeful even if I or anyone else did not understand it. I wanted to preserve his writing as it was given to me. He was very into Slam Poetry, so in my mind I read it similarly to what it might sound like on stage with a rhythm.
Amanda,
I woke up this morning massively happy. Talking to you and spending time with you and just conversating was amazing. We talked about everything and had a wonderful evening. You got to see where I am from and what I am about and we got to connect on a level that is more than what we can do through these digital words online. I dig that.
I want to get together with you again soon and do something. I think it would be awesome if we did something creative together. If we went and bought some paint and a canvas and spent some time painting or if we tried to write a short play together those would both be good ways of spending time together. Maybe lets take some time and get together and draw some still lives together. What would you think about that?
We could get together and read together and bring our favorite books together and when we get to a part that we really like we could read our favorite passages to each other. That might be a good way to spend some time together. I could actually make an effort to find some music that I like and we could get together and play our favorite songs to each other. We could eat some cheese while we do that and maybe drink some wine. Just a wine and cheese and music for an evening. I can think of lots of ways to spend evenings with you and maybe we can find the time to spend some of these evenings together.
After last night I want the chance to have more nights like that with you where we just spend time together and watch time pass us by while we can see each other being indigo. We can get together and tear some systems down together and give the crystal children something to build up again. We can break it down like legos and give them the pieces and say here we had fun taking this apart , what do you think you could build with it.
I want to know more about what you think of these crystal children and I want to know more about what you think of these indigo children. where can I meet more of these wonderful souls. I have heard stories but have met few. You seem alive and I dig that about you. Just that you seem alive that your soul seems like its pulsating with energy and that your exploring life and enjoying exploring it. Your not even winded by having large numbers attributed to what you have to pay back to somebody you seem to be living through each moment and are just loving all of it the good and the bad. I dig that.
I want to say a lot more that I said last night to you. I bet we can have even more amazing and maybe even powerful conversations. I want to tell you more of my secrets , i want to confide in you. I want to tell you things that I am afraid to tell anyone else because of your ability to love. I want to try and open up all the avenues of myself that scare me to tell anyone else and I want to go through the fear of just opening up places inside of myself that I cant see myself saying to someone else that has less of an ability to love than you. I dont quite know what I will say but I want to see what happens when we conversate through intense conversations with each other.
I think your intense and i think i am intense and I bet we can be intense together.
-Nicholas
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